rest now hush now

These are photos I find really beautiful.

Beauty is such a weird, subjective thing. It's actually completely fabricated - it's not even real. The reality of beauty is one we create ourselves. We have the ability to submit to how society defines it, or we can establish our own definition of beauty.

Doing that latter can be so difficult though. It's interesting to study what is and is not considered beautiful. Why is this prettier? Why is this uglier? Where has this standard come from?

Beauty, in actuality, is an inbred stigma. In times of African slavery in America, light skinned slaves were allowed in the house because they were believed to be more intelligent, more relatable, and ultimately more white. There are stigmas attached to beauty, or were stigmas attached to beauty/what was considered to be beautiful. It's sick, but it influences where we as teens are now. Where we as humanity are now. Stigmas define beauty, and beauty projects these stigmas. It's interesting that now, those who are beautiful are often considered less intelligent. Where do these stigmas come from? Why do we equate so much to physical beauty? Why can't beauty be the weird and the ugly?

These photos below are ones I love. I don't feel like explaining why.



I really haven't posted in a while.

In a way I'm glad I've taken a moment to step back from this internet journal and indulge in living life without a constant need to urgently document what I fear I will forget.

I recently had a conversation with a girl on tumblr, and our conversation turned introspective and I feel an earthly calmness and nirvana overtaking my conscience as I reflect on what we talked about. It's a weird feeling of piece and reflective eloquence. It's like my tongue is buzzing and vibrating softly, purring. It's weird, but comforting. Weird. Everything is weird.

My thoughts on vision:

it's insane when you begin to realize how many people have seen the sites you've seen, created memories with these sites based around their own experiences, and yet you realize that their memories and their vision of these sites is completely different from yours even if they viewed it from the same angle as you. vision and site are so intriguing because it's completely individual. it's almost an autonomous experience, the ability to see, because you have complete jurisdiction over what you choose to take away from the image in front of you. eyes are incredible because they're like mirrors and windows; we're outside the glass, and we're the only ones who get to determine what's inside the house. it's fascinating. 

All these photos are from tumblr. Sources have been lost at sea like stolen treasure destined to sink to the sandy floor never to be seen again. The third to the bottom is Picasso's. Pure genius.



School has begun. It's sort of a weird transition and summer feels like a world lived in a past life and I just can't get my mind wrapped around the constant due dates and dilemmas and decisions to be made. My favorite classes are English and Chemistry, and I'm happy that I finally love science class because it's a subject I'm so interested in but a class I've never enjoyed. It's funny how whenever I have the time to be creative, I hardly am, and when I have no time to be creative I wish I had the time to be, but when I finally get the time I waste it doing other teenagery things. This Friday my friend and I are going rock climbing (at an indoor gym, we aren't actually that cool), and I am beyond excited. I downloaded a rock climbing app on my phone, so I can virtually prep for the real life adventure I will soon take part on.

My room is also finally decorated and perfect and has become a nice sanctuary for my inhabitance. I will post pictures when I find the time.

Here is some art I love with all my art. I've been really interested in minimal and simple line work lately.

my favorite Gustav Klimt piece


Sad Shower in New York, 1995

my favorite Picasso piece. His line sketches are some of my favorites and I'll make a post dedicated to them soon.

unknown but I die for this piece

A RISD student --- ugh I love so much. I wish I could see like this.


a girl is a gun

School has started and I feel like with this new beginning has come a drainage of creativity. I have come to terms with the reality that my time will now be full of essays, tests, and studying with an extreme lacking of creation. My favorite class right now is AP English and I hope my days don't turn into cloudy perceptions of hackneyed desire.

david bowie, a.k.a the king to I the queen


sky ferriera i think

dana boulos i think

some awesome crank

more awesome crank

flash with passion

bang bang



thought provoking so think

Andy Warhol the other king

rocks by an artist

art my an artist

art that rocks and is nice

i aspire to create this


ginger & rosa

I woke up at 8 am this morning to bad cramps and period-related dry heaving. So to null my pain I decided to watch Ginger & Rosa, a movie starring Elle Fanning, the red head from Mad Men, and some other people.

To put it quite simply, it was amazing. Beautiful sets, amazing cinematography. It was really captivating, but also rather empty. I felt like it was an instrument missing some strings, preventing you from playing the entire piece. But I'm not really bothered by that. I think it was perfect just the way it was. To be honest, I liked it more than Moonrise Kingdom. Mood wise/aesthetically, I felt it was a hybrid of The Virgin Suicides and Lost and Delirious. 

It takes place in 1960s London during the Cuban Missile Fire. Two best friends, Ginger and Rosa, are similar yet different yet united yet divided. Both precocious but in entirely different ways, the movie highlights the maturation experienced in teendom, as well as the growth that ultimately can lead to two united souls to split off, running from each other, perhaps unconsciously, and somehow, perhaps, perchance, finding their way back to each other. Elle was fucking awesome no shit and the girl that played Rosa was great as well. I related to both characters in many ways.

I found it interesting how while Rosa seemed so precocious and mature, her desires really seemed to highlight her vulnerability and naïvety as a character. Ginger, while precocious in her own way, was also naïve, but in the way that we all are as teenagers. I related to Ginger almost entirely and completely (besides all that dad drama). Her activism kind of inspired my life and mirrored my life all at the same time. Protests are rad. Her passions, fears, and demeanor seemed to mirror my own existence and her interests in things that nobody understood, even her best friend, were basically my life made into one single line said while in a bathtub in blue jeans.

This movie is definitely one that is extremely important to me. It is probably one of my favorites. Despite something seeming empty, I think it needed to be that way. It needed to have missing strings in order to be complete. Ginger is literally me. This movie basically defines me. I just want to put on my glasses and see it over and over again.

I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it.

I watched it on TV, so I couldn't get any screenshots, but I found some pretty ones online and on tumblr.

Pow Wow.